Why You Should Only Ever Date Writers
Date a writer because they feel. They feel so strongly, so deeply, that every offhand word you said to them across the bar will be etched into their forearm like that time Harry Potter had to write with Dolores Umbridge’s quill. Nothing can be taken lightly, nothing can be forgotten — writers are composed of a thousand flowing, surging concepts and ideas, each one spawned from a single sideways glance. A simple “hello” will be torn apart and rebuilt into an essay about “goodbye.” Don’t worry, they will do the translating themselves.
A writer is not like you, or me. A writer is something more, something special. Unlike the unwashed masses who sit, Cheetos dribbling from their open mouths, in front of The Big Bang Theory — writers read. While a particularly well-drafted essay from Wilde or Fitzgerald might send them spinning into a depression from which they can…
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